Sourdough Discard Cheese Pretzel Franken-Crackers

I received a sourdough starter from my sister in law this past Christmas (his name is Gerald).

I like baking the occasional super lazy loaf of bread but frankly sourdough bread is a helluva undertaking and I can barely be trusted to keep my starter alive in the fridge much less lovingly feed it up twice a day for a week, and anyway why bother with all that when I already have to find a way to use up my discard starter. So in my attempts to find inventive and delicious ways to not throw out food (regardless of the fact that it's barely a step away from paper mache) I turned instead to an enduring love of mine, the snacky cracker.

Based on the stuff I tend to have on hand and my own tastes I ended up switching back and forth pretty regularly between two recipes but ever the fiddler, of course I ended up smashing them together to form delicious snacky Voltron.

The first attempt was a cheese cracker because lets not fool ourselves, cheese.

Curious Cuisiniere SOURDOUGH CHEESE CRACKERS

This yielded a pretty amazing cracker comparable to what cheese nips WISH they could be, BUT it required one entire cup of discard, eight hours of dough resting, a fairly large amount of cheese, and working in multiple batches. Fantastic if I JUST HAPPENED to have everything on hand, was super bored, and wanted some crackers sometime tomorrow.


But frankly, I'm always busy and I always want crackers now. Enter the Pretzel Cracker Recipe


BakeNQuilt - Sourdough Surprises: Pretzel Crackers

I did two batches so one was a straightforward coarse salt, the other was vanilla sugar. These were fast and light and crisp and super easy but they were just... missing something.

The second time I made them I realized my olive oil had gone rancid (???) and I had to sub in another oil. Remembering the butter in the earlier recipe and figuring the temps were not so far off that I had to worry about burning I took a gamble and it paid off. Noms.

From there I started to really play. Mustard/garlic/paprika/butter pretzel crackers, a successfully halved batch of the cheese crackers, Honey/mustard/Worcestershire/toasted garlic pretzel crackers... you name it.

Each has its strengths and weaknesses but in the end I grew weary of each and sought to create my own hybrid.

So this is what I've come up with:

Cheese Pretzel Franken-Crackers

Active Prep in total: probably about 15-20 min

Resting time: 30 min to 1 hr

Cooking time 20-25 minutes

Mix together wet for starter mix:

• 1/2 cup discarded sourdough starter
• 2 tsb oil (have used both melted butter and olive oil successfully)

Mix together dry for flour mix:

• 1/2 cup (I usually use ~2oz by weight) white whole wheat flour
• 1/4 tsp onion powder
• 1/4 tsp mustard powder
• 1/4 tsp salt
• heavy dash paprika (I use a smoked paprika)

Set up and hold aside for later

• 2-3 oz firm cheese finely shredded/grated  (I have used asiago and several cheddars)
• 1/2 cup water 
• 1 & 1/2 tsp baking soda
• coarse sea salt or other garnish of choice

Directions

• Combine starter mix and flour mix until it forms a soft dough
• shape into a rectangular piece approx 1/2 inch thick - wrap and let rest in fridge 30 min-1hr

While dough is resting

• Heat water to boiling and add baking soda 
• stir to combine, set aside, and allow to cool

After dough has rested

• preheat oven to 375
• begin kneading dough, incorporating shredded cheese thoroughly a handful at a time 
• the dough will be loose due to the cheese but once the cheese is well incorporated and you see it start firming up a little it should be good to go 

Rolling out
IT WILL BE HELPFUL TO DO THIS NEXT STEP ON SOMETHING FLEXIBLE, NONSTICK, AND ABOUT THE SAME SIZE AS YOUR BAKING SHEET LIKE TRIMMED PARCHMENT OR A SILPAT AS YOU WILL HAVE TO FLIP IT OVER AFTER ROLLING IT OUT AND IT WILL BE VERY THIN AND STICKY

• Roll out dough on a lightly floured surface until comfortably covering the majority of a cookie sheet and ~ 1/16 inch thick 
• erring on the thin side will give you a very light crisp cracker, erring on the thicker side will give you a pleasantly tender cracker
• Caveat: I have completely forgotten the light flouring part once or twice and been just fine

Once dough is the preferred shape and thickness

• brush entire surface with cooled baking soda wash and allow to soak in ~2 minutes
• flip dough over onto lightly floured final baking surface (if you happen to have two silpat sheets you will be very happy for that fact at this point) 
• repeat baking soda brushing and soaking
• Sprinkle top with coarse sea salt or topping of choice (Trader Joe's Everything but the Bagel Seasoning is AMAZING for this) 
• Cut with pizza cutter or knife into squares - you do not have to separate the pieces

Bake for 20-25 minutes total, turning tray half way

• Start checking the edge crackers to watch for browning at about 15 minutes and pull out any well browned crackers
• I have only ever done these on a silpat on a dark coated cookie sheet, you may want to watch a little more carefully on a different surface
• Remove crackers to cool on a rack

Attempt not to eat them all in one sitting, but know that you will probably fail.

Monday Monday Part 5 - A New Beginning

The Friday the 13th reference is apropos of absolutely nothing, that's just where my brain went this morning.

Not as much to report this week as I would like.

Tuesday night was game night, so unless you have interest in my very bare surface understanding of the Dungeons & Dragons 5e system there's not much to go into there.

Lvl 2 Goliath Barbarian, in case you are wondering

Wednesday was colour session one on my Halloween inspired bat sleeve with John Lally at Masquerade Tattoo. It was a bit gruelling but so cool to watch the piece start coming to life bit by bit.

At our first break I texted this pic to my husband and it was the first time I had gotten to see it from the "proper" angle. What looked like some nifty shading from my perspective practically jumps off my arm in 3D from the right side up. There is, not incidentally, an entire BACK of my arm to this project as well.

Interesting note; I am apparently more upset about the movie Prometheus than I am about someone repeatedly and painfully injecting ink into my arm over the course of several hours. Anyone who feels like having a captive audience to talk about horror hit me up for when my next appointment is scheduled.

I'm not entirely joking. It really helps.

Thursday I got to hang out with the family, my Mom is doing better every day and seeing my brother is always a pleasure.

Friday was kind of a crappy day at work so when I got home I buried myself in TV and crafting. My husband eventually went out to a local music show leaving me to my own devices.

These devices apparently didn't involve hitting the bathroom until about 8:30... which is when I found this Limecrime lipstick I've been eyeing for months casually taped to the mirror! Because my husband is the ginchiest I now have Velvetine lipsticks in Beet It, Utopia (the color I wore for my wedding), and Pansy. I just realized all three of these colours are LEs, woo!

I will probably continue eyeing Red Velvet and Wicked (both reds) for some time to come. My current go-to red is NYX Soft Matte Lip Cream in Monte Carlo. Not that I have any lack of red lipsticks but when you got one that really works it can be hard to commit to an untried product for a night out.

Craft wise I switched up working on the Blackwork piece to get some work done on Shades of Red. So far everything in this piece has been a study in extremes. Huge blocks of slightly mind numbing unrelenting black background or incredibly fussy "confetti" stitching of no more than three stitches of one colour at a time. Thankfully the next section should be a much larger section of colour which will hopefully be a bit more laid back.

I'm realizing as I get further into this project that I like the higher count fabrics more and more and I think I will be sticking to 1/1 on 25 count and up from now on. I thought the lower count would be easier on the eyes but it's not really until you get to 18 and the annoyance of dealing with two strands of floss for proper coverage on a full coverage project is NOT worth the small amount of relief.
I don't think the dark color of this fabric is helping much either.

I'm sort of gearing up to work on the Bowie piece. I FINALLY settled on a fabric but I prefer to work with floss cards and making your own floss cards for intricate designs with upwards of 75 colours is possibly even fussier work than much of the cross stitching itself.

Controlled Chaos

There used to be a system available from a brand called LoRan with little soft binders and pre-punched cards, Dritz has taken over the cards but they don't have enough colours on each card for the sorts of projects I do and they are small for my needs (also SPENDY). I am strongly considering altering some kind of 3 ring datebook to be a project floss holder. Come to think of it I should have a really nice pink leather one lying around somewhere that would probably be just perfect.

As far as the #yearostitch project I am really hoping to get that underway in the next few days. I just haven't taken the time to find the first entry (um, nevermind... check) and take stock of what fabric I will need. I kind of like how Instagram user @Queenofslacking has laid it all out in 20x20 blocks so I'll probably do something like that.

OH! I sort of idly mused last night that I hadn't seen a ship notification for that cone of thread I mentioned buying last week only to dig back through my emails and realize I never.... actually... ordered it.

I know I hit submit on Paypal but I'm pretty sure I must have closed the browser before hitting the final submit on the full order, so I went to do it aaaaaaall over again. I missed out on the shipping coupon but happily the cones were still half off, and threw in a clip on magnifier to boot since I've resigned myself to staring cross eyed at impossibly fine evenweave for the next decade or so.

Oh also, Cheeeeese Gromet!
My Cheese of the Month delivery came on Saturday. I've already tucked into the Dubliner and the Mellville and can highly recommend both on their own merits.

Cheese Plate Update Two (Electric Boogaloo)

We interrupt your not terribly regular broadcast for more cheese!

I have about eight more cheeses I could discuss - and that's not even counting my February cheese of the month offerings - but I figure four per post is more than enough. It's not like cheese reviews are going to go bad.

In other cheese related news I've started poking at baking a bit more so I'm excited to try a cracker recipe I found which was designed specifically to showcase cheese and I'm looking for a nice baguette recipe, because baguette.

Comte

(from http://www.gourmet-food.com ) Comté has a floral aroma with nutty fudge flavors developing in the more mature cheese. The taste is full of nuts and toffee with a lovely long and salty finish. Older cheeses take on a strong, farmyard-like character. The cheese has a thin beige rind which thickens and hardens as the cheese matures.

I've recently had both an older and a younger comte and per my usual preferences the older was the favorite by far.  Aging gives this cheese a savory fullness  (an om nom nom ness, you might say) that I particularly enjoy. I do think the younger would be an ideal choice for introducing someone to the kind of stuff you can't order from the average deli. It has a touch of that Emmental brightness (aka that classic "Swiss Cheese" flavor) but is otherwise really smooth and mild so it presents some nice complexity without being overwhelming.

Jarlsberg

(from cheese.com) Jarlsberg is a mild, semi-soft cow’s milk cheese of Norwegian origin. Created by Anders Larsen Bakke, it resembles a Swiss Emmental with distinctive, open and irregular ‘eyes’. Many a times Jarlsberg is marketed as a Swiss cheese because of its characteristics, though it tends to be sweeter and stronger than Emmentaler.
Beneath the yellow-wax rind of Jarlsberg is a semi-firm yellow interior that is buttery, rich in texture with a mild, nutty flavour... Since the cheese melts so well, Jarlsberg tastes delicious on sandwiches, fondues, quiches and on hot dishes.

This initially stuck me as extremely nutmeg-y! A little more of that "Swiss cheese" bite, but well balanced out by a lot of sweetness and butter. Pleasantly chewy and firm so I'll happily forgo any kind of cracker or fruit to nosh on this all by its lonesome, though I have to be really careful doing that as I'll end up eating ridiculous swaths of it in endless stream of "just one more paper thin slice".

Beemster Goat

(from beemster.us) Beemster Goat cheese, aged for 4 months, smooth & regresing has a wonderfully clean, sweet taste. Decidedly different from fresh chèvre, this cheese is sure to please even those who are not goat cheese connoisseurs, making it the perfect introductory cheese for consumers new to the goat category.

Again decidedly nutmeggy! Quite creamy and fresh with only a little goatyness (more in the aftertaste than anything) but I can't help but feel like I would like this MUCH better if it were aged long enough to bring out more caramel and add some of those neat crunchy crystals into the texture.

Pittig, 4 year old Gouda 

(from www.eatmorecheese.me)
Extra aged gouda - 4 years
Pasteurized Cow's Milk
From the Netherlands
Traditional Rennet

An almost toffee-like sweetness brings to mind fresh cows’ milk and accentuates notes of nuttiness in this versatile aged Gouda that is a perfect table cheese and can add wondrous flavor to your favorite sandwich. Hints of butterscotch also make Pittig an ideal selection as a dessert cheese.  

This is, to put it plainly, my jam.

Every time I have an aged Gouda I fall a little more in love, so I held on to this one from my holiday cheese gifts knowing it would be something special and I was RIGHT. I found this to be very salty and kind of popcorn-y but I DID eat it with a rather sweet Jazz apple. I can see how that would read as butterscotch with a more neutral accompaniment.

Cheese plate update

I'm trying this "occasional blogging about cheese" thing out because frankly, I love cheese. I think I eat more cheese than anyone else I know, which might very well be saying something.

I'm not an expert, just a REALLY REALLY REALLY enthusiastic amateur.

Wallace And Gromit know where it's at

Ironically, I'm also lactose intolerant. Thankfully my supply of Lactase enzyme is usually prodigious enough to keep up with my adventurous palate, though there was that time I had Lactaid overnighted to my hotel at Disney because I didn't pack enough and they apparently don't sell it on site?!?

Anyway, it's one of my great loves and I'm sharing it because this is my blog and that's my life!

I'm going to try to make this a semi regular round-up post though I'm not sure what kind of time frame I will leave between posts.

I bought some cheese for myself to have a nice snack for my holiday week staycation. Then I got an ASTOUNDING amount of cheese from my In-Laws for Christmas (left side of the pic above was my fridge on Christmas night).THEN I got a C'est Cheese Cheese of the month club subscription from my Husband for my birthday the week after (right side of the pic above was January's picks)  so there's a bit more than usual to talk about right at this moment! Due to the sheer volume of cheese I ended up eating a lot of the fresher cheeses first and leaving the aged cheeses for later.

I'm not really going to talk about what I use as a vehicle for the cheese because honestly I eat it with what I have around. If I happen to use something interesting I'll mention it.

After the jump I'm going to start off with some particularly notable ones I've had in the last several weeks and fill in the gaps from there in future posts.

It's alive, it's alive!

I'm sorry, it's been pretty quiet around here as I continue to recover from the whirlwind of my wedding. 

I've been at an interesting point beauty-wise for the intervening couple of months which definitely deserves its own post, but for now I'll say I'm starting to feel like doing the pretty thing again.

It also occurred to me today that I really like talking about cheese, and I have this handy blog thing here that I neglect, so I should totally like... do something with that. I'm not an expert by any means but I am QUITE a fan and I have been trying some pretty fun stuff lately.

My actual fridge the day after Christmas.

TL:DR - You may occasionally see posts about cheese. 

Hopefully my random-person opinions on cheese (rather than the words of some fancy frommagier*) will pique your interest.  

(*I made that up).

So, on to the usual "the Itsy Bitsy" thing...

I actually did a BUNCH of beauty related retail therapy yesterday.

I've mentioned Fashion Project here before, they re-sell higher end donated clothing at problematically good prices with a significant (listed) portion of each sale benefiting the charity of the donator's choice. It's catch as catch can of course, but they have a fair amount of product on a BEAUTIFULLY navigable site so finding something good tends to be a bit TOO easy.

They have "Personal Invite Links" which give the original linker a $20 credit if a person ends up buying through that link.
I'm not saying you should definitely use my link, but it would be pretty cool if you did!

I ended up picking up a very frivolous pair of Brian Atwood "Consort" heels in pink yesterday which benefited Breast Intentions and a very functional Dooney and Bourke black pleated leather clutch which benefited Canine Assistants Inc. They pull the listing once the sale is made so I can't get to the pics to link them here, but I'll post pics once they arrive. I spent less than 30% of the list prices on the two items so I consider it good hunting rather than poor decision making.

I had a haircut after work (as always props to Fran at Cactus Salon in Holbrook) and I finally went for it and cut off the last of the hair I grew out for the wedding. I'm now back in my super short pixie happy place, though the sides are buzzed, as is the style of the time (if Instagram is to be believed anyway). I shied away from short sides for a while because it can be harsh, but I love what it does for my cheekbones so I'm playing with it.

From there I went to Ulta and got my eyebrows done at the Benefit Brow Bar at the Patchogue store. This is the fourth time I've gotten my brows done there and I've been quite happy every time.

My brows are pretty sparse so I usually have a terrible time getting someone to do them so that it comes out evenly. Sadly I'm terrible with names and I can't find the card I got, but I'm pretty sure the woman I've seen every time is named Tanya, and I like how decisive she is. I went for a higher arch than usual this time and I'm not sure if I want to stick with that, but it does look quite nice.

While I was there I also picked up some Freeman face masques as I have become rather enamored of cleansing my face with anything but soap.  I picked up the Charcoal & Black Sugar Facial Polishing Mask and the Pineapple Facial Enzyme Mask because both seemed pretty straightforward in the ingredients and low on the eye stabbing perfume.

On the nail front I got two discounted China Glaze Pop Top sets for $10 each.
Full size China Glaze for $2.50 a bottle? Yeeeeeaaaaaah, couldn't resist that. So I got those in "Glisten Up" (the four colours on the left) and "Feeling Sparkly"(the four right).

I feel a bit indecisive about what to do with my nails next but I've had naked nails for two days now so I'll probably get on that soon. I keep thinking about going for a professional pedicure and then... not. Mostly because I've spent so many afternoons at the vet lately, but that's a whole other story.

I still have approximately 1/4 of the pedicure from my wedding remaining! Sexy!